Sunday, July 02, 2006

Taco Cabana

The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing.

Website: [See website for locations and hours]

Forget this is a chain. Forget this a TexMex place. Forget this is a fast food place. Think marinated rotisserie chicken. Are you thinking of it? OK. Good.

Now, think of a buff chicken of tender years enjoying a satisfying, fulfilled life and yearning to sacrifice itself for the betterment of mankind. Imagine the young martyr citrus-marinated until it is swimming in bone-melting goodness, impaled on a spit and spinning like Beethoven until it is golden brown on the outside, but still moist and tender and devastatingly succulent on the inside. Then place it alongside greens and rice and borracho beans so tasty they are worthy of being the main course. Take a warm flour tortilla made right there on the little machine you can see through the window and spread it open. Down the middle spoon a line of pico del gallo over a thick line of salsa fuego (the black hot sauce) and top it with a row of jalapeƱo slices. Roll it up and you’re ready for thirty minutes of conversation-stopping pleasure.

The rest of the menu? I have no idea. You’ll have to ask somebody else. I’ve been eating at this San Antonio-based fast food chain for 20 years and I’ve never ordered anything else.


Jeanne Damoff said...

Okay, sure. I can forget it's a chain. And that it's TexMex and fast food. In fact, I might as well forget about the place completely, because we don't have one.

This is just plain wrong, Brad. You're making me hungry for fast food of all things, and I can't get it.

Did you ever consider becoming a food critic? Because I think you'd be a natural.

michael snyder said...

Yeah, what Jeanne said! And now I'm all hungry but can't do anything about it without waking someone up. Thanks alot, Brad!

Brad Whittington said...

Snyderman, next time, don't read a food blog at midnight! Geez.

JD: That's what travel is all about. Perhaps they'll have one in Krakow.

Check this out, it will take your mind off food:

Jeanne Damoff said...

Taco Cabana in Krakow? I'll be sure to ask first thing.

Okay I just spent a fun half hour at Wunderfool. (Haven't watched the alien or enema clips yet. I'll come back, though.) How do you come across this stuff? Now I have an image stuck in my head of skinny Asian women in 80s aerobics attire, marching, smiling, and chanting, "I was robbed by two men." Beyond weird. (No wonder I love it.) Thanks for posting the link.

shanna said...

Oh, dear...Taco Cabana! Love, love that place. Ate there the first time when I visited a friend at Trinity College. Was converted right there on the spot. Now all I do is pine for the salsa bar wherever I fine myself at Taco Hell.

Let's hear it for those selfless chickens!


shanna said...

Yes, I 'fine' myself when I visit Taco Bell--$1 a visit and a boot to the head.

Sigh. I've been in the sun too long today.

Heather Diane Tipton said...

I've eaten at TC most of my life and have never had the rotisserie chicken. The "black hot sauce"... roasted salsa...yummy.

Eric said...
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Eric said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Eric said...

Good to see The Whip is still cracking mad.

And TC is the "drunk food" and "hangover food" destination in San Antonio. Thankfully there's always a big white, salmon, chalky mint green, and pale blue building with the bright red neon letters to stand as a lighthouse in the night, a beacon of flavor as intense as it is inexpensive. Fantastique!

-Eric (the Deacon remix)

PS Crazy gibberish...